Welcome to the Annual Year End Roast of Lyndsey & Jana

It’s been a good year. A great year, actually. Like always, I’ve gotten to meet some of the best people and hang out with the most fun couples and bridal parties! But like every good bowl of queso, it must come to an end. And that’s where I come in. Now, if you’re new here and genuinely confused by everything I’m writing, buckle up. Because I’m about to take you on the jump scare ride of your life. You see, for years I’ve watched fellow photographers post their year in blogs that contained gracefully “candid” images of them helping bridesmaids, or adjusting ties, or carrying a bride’s dress with such poise. And I so desperately wanted to post a blog like that. But then I remembered I walk like Sasquatch and have the most confused resting face. It just wasn’t in the cards for me. But that’s okay. Because these blogs give you the most authentic version of me on a wedding day. Jan Jan and I have been tackling weddings for 13 years. That’s over 200 weddings. That’s 200 pieces of cake. Which explains a lot looking back on these pictures. Ha! So, sit back and enjoy this montage of behind the scenes images from our 2022 wedding season!

Here we go, right outta the gate. Let’s get it dude.

I would like to mention that this here plant stabbed me 3 different times that day.

Everyone here is for sure questioning every word I’m saying. And honestly I don’t blame them

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Sometimes I wonder if she’s secretly trying to read the letters as well.

This is me wandering around aimlessly trying to find that ideal light. Also the poster image for ADHD.

Im just gonna scooch in here for a moment. Don’t mind me.

Did someone say liver dumplings?

I just….wow….this…so beautiful.

This is the “We need to go take family formals, but I also want you to enjoy your guests, but we also need to stick to the timeline” face.

We are easily won over with food. Specifically sweets.

There is so much I could say about this one but none of it is deemed appropriate so we will just leave this here for your imagination.

No no Jan, you aren’t in my shot at all! In fact I think you could get closer.

Mrs. Steal Yo Dog is back.

Hi, my name is Lyndsey and I love flowers more than any sane person should.

This next series of images is a personal favorite. I’ll set the scene. Beautiful, but windy, mid April afternoon. Super romantic first look on the rooftop overlooking downtown St. Louis. Personal vows. And then theres Jana. Desperately trying to hold onto the veil so it doesn’t blow into the Mississippi River. Just enjoy watching her struggle to take pictures and not ruin the bride’s day.

If I remember correctly it took both J-Dawg and I 10 whole minutes to untie the knot I made to hold the curtain back.

I can edit a lot of things but it’s kinda hard to edit a crouching Janice out of the background.

I think I’m wayyyyy funnier than I really am. Clearly.

HERE COMES JANA (Insert the Jack Nicholson)

If you see me standing like this don’t worry. I’m fine. My 80 year old back is just acting up again.

Not gonna lie, this kinda looks like an episode of National Geographic where the chimps pick bugs off each other. Just me?

Also ripped off the curtain rod. I don’t have a good record with curtains.

Neither of these items are mine. Hat nor drink. How did I end up with them? No clue.

Here is a candid photo of a Janet in the wild, reading what she loves most. Timelines.

I somehow ended up with a hat. She actively went out and found one. Bless her heart.

I look like a toad perched on a rock. How am I married?

Lawd. Look at those CHINS! You could go skiing on those slopes!

Is she getting balcony shots or is she secretly on Facebook Marketplace?

“Okay! You all are about this far from the side of the cliff that falls directly into the Missouri River.”

Is she lost? Is she confused? Did someone mention a donut table?

We’ve been trying to reach you about your car’s extended warranty.

I feel bad for Dads who do first looks with me. They’ve never met me. Now they’re holding my hand with their eyes closed as I lead them to another room where their daughter is. All while listening to my vague instructions of which pieces of furniture not to hit.

Sometimes you just need to go sit at an empty table and secretly eat your dessert.

Ok. A couple things here. 1) There is no reason to be sitting on the chair like that. 2) Girlfriend put those dogs away! Why are your toes even out? I know its a women’s locker room chair but it doesn’t deserve that.

I’m a little lad who loves berries and cream.

Jo Jo here is loving this moment as much as the bride. What a lovely honorary bride.

I’m telling you the amount of trust these poor dads put in us is scary. Have you ever ridden with Jan in a car? Dangerous.

When you bring along a Jana she will find places to rest.

This is a photo of a J-Wow browsing a “Free” table….mid ceremony…

I feel special when I get to run through the tunnel too.

I don’t know what you’re doing? Are you hot? Do you need new pants?

Only the best photographers get to eat dinner by the women’s restroom.

Here is an evolving Janine who has learned the art of securing a veil. You just make it into a cute little belt.

That one time I cut my hair off and then realized it wouldn’t fit into the iconic bun and then walked around all day looking like a young boy from a Renaissance art painting.

Family Formal lists are taken very seriously. Your name gets called and you don’t show up? Boom. Joyce cuts you out of the family. Joyce does not wait. Joyce needs to stick to the timeline.

Me: Hey I’m gonna get a quick shot of the outside of the building for details. Don’t let anyone come through the doors. I’ll come get you when I’m done.

Janice: …10 seconds later… “Hey! You done yet?

I don’t know what to do with my hands.

Still the best dress fluffer in the Tri-State area!

I will find a way to third wheel your new marriage. And I will succeed.

So many questions. Why the boots? Why am I sitting in a random chair? Why do I look like I’m about to take an oath? Why are my eyes closed?

“Welcome”

I was under pressure to get the buttons on. I thought I had a cool, calm, and collected face on. False. Sheer panic.

And this is why J-Hope has been Employee of the Month for the past 2 months. Such dedication.

“Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass…but learning to play in the rain.” Okay, well tell that to a bride and the photographer and videographer…..

Follow the leader. Even if she only knows one hairstyle.

Its me. Hi. I’m the problem. It’s me.

Okay, just act natural. Like no one is around. Like its just the two of you.

At this point I promised the Jana I would stop and get her Nacho Fries from Taco Bell after the wedding.

Wednesday? Wednesday Addams? Is that you?

I probably need some kind of medication.Who even makes faces like this?

What a lush.

Little back story here. This venue made their own Love Lock Bridge for all their couples. Jana was looking at all the locks and broke one. This is a picture of the Jana desperately trying to repair the lock. Soooo sorry to Kyle and Sarah! Hope your love lasts anyway!

Look out. Dale Earnhardt Jr. is ready to fly.

Again, I am not qualified to mess with hair or dresses. I know cameras and light. That’s it.

J-Cole’s mixtape coming soon. 2023. It’s finna be lit. No cap. Or whatever the kids say these days.

Run Forrest Run!!!! Don’t pee Forrest!

There’s not a thought one in that brain of mine here. Lights are on but no one is home.

That dog is thinking “please make her go away.”

That time the couple did smoke bombs after a rain and the smoke settled and then the venue owners lit fire pits and it looked like a Civil War reenactment.

Wedding days are filled with such joy.

And here we have a portrait of a little 14th Century boy playing with cloth and paper.

When you’re in a wedding but also photographing a wedding.

More Nacho Fries are in her future.

This is how important timelines are to me. I’m checking a schedule and completely ignoring the fresh cinnamon roll that was put on my plate. Thats dedication folks. I’m a fat kid. We don’t ignore cinnamon rolls.

On a more serious note, this season has been fantastic. I have truly enjoyed being able to spend my weekends with some of the most fantastic people. Mom and I always leave weddings feeling super grateful for the connections and friendships made on a wedding day. 2023 brides, it’s your time to shine! I hope you’re ready for us, because we are ready for you!